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Don’t rescue

There are two types of rescuers – those who do good and those who think they are doing good. The latter wants to please others by trying to solve their problems. When this rescuer plays saviour it’s often to their own and others detriment. This type of rescuer looks for an opportunity to help others with their health, finances, relationships and even happiness. And although their actions may seem altruistic and selfless – looking deeper often uncovers this rescuer’s own need for control, importance, self worth and even power. When we rescue others we rob them of learning – learning in their way not ours. Everyone needs to learn through his or her own experiences or they don’t get the lesson. What we thought was help can be harm. I’m not talking about an appropriate level of support, guidance and nurture. Not rescuing doesn’t mean we don’t help – on the contrary, it means we help in a different way. When we rescue we control and disempower When we support we guide and empower. Successful and fulfilled people stay out of drama and focus on their own life plans, rather than trying to fix everybody around them. Like the flight attendant giving the safety instructions “In case of an…

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Have some fun

A smart way to create the life you want is to find the FUN in the journey. Beyond a serious and sober existence lies a playground of possibility – it all doesn’t have to be so serious. Remember the little you in pre-school days – with play time, eat time and sleep time? Your learning and development was done through play. Fast forward – is playtime still there or is it a distant memory? Do weeks pass by with no play, fun or laughter? Faced with a fork in the road and a choice between a “fun road” or “humdrum road” which would you choose? Do you value fun as a way to high achievement and fulfillment? I value fun, so I wasn’t surprised when a recent values inventory given by The Corporate Anthropologist – Michael Henderson identified some of my top values as Simplicity/Play: To see simplicity in complexity and take a playful attitude towards organisations and systems that is energising and positive. Fantasy/Play: To enrich personal worth through fantasy and play. I do seek fun and playfulness over dull routines. Sure, we can reach high achievement but without finding the FUN, fulfillment may escape you. As a Thought Leaders Mentor I help clever people be…

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Love what you do

The fact is that the high cost of living, combined with our desire to have more and more, often means we are under constant pressure to get ahead. When we are aware of what we need to live, and what it will cost to get the extra things we want, we can often experience fear, which may either help us to achieve, or hinder our progress. In the short-term, fear of not meeting our commitments may motivate us, but in the long-term, there are negative consequences by being driven by fear, including stress. When we work each day and are motivated in a sustainable way, towards achieving success and meeting our commitments, we will thrive in the long-term. Thriving in the long term is summed up well by Thought Leaders mantra: Do work you love, With people you like, The way you want. As one of the Deans at Thought Leaders Business School I not only live each day doing work I love, with people I like, the way I like but we get to help others realise the same. As a faculty, we get to spend time with motivated people who have hope and see the possibility for a better life, a life by design with greater purpose and…

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Want to hit your TARGET?

It may not necessarily be easy, but the way to reach your desired destination is often more simple than you think. When we get clear and stay focussed we are more likely to hit our TARGET! Think back over the last few years – have you set a goal and not reached it? It happens to all of us. And did you get frustrated and annoyed with yourself for not reaching your goal? When this happens time and time again we can lose motivation, start feeling stuck and settle for a mediocre life. As the author of How To Have It All I’ve identified key characteristics of those who maintain motivation and consistently hit their TARGET. I’ve created a model that shows you how. But before we get going in any direction – let’s stop and start at the beginning. It starts with deciding why you want to hit your chosen TARGET. Without a strong why many miss hitting their TARGET all their life. Finding clarity by getting super clear about your why is what will drive your productivity, fuel your discipline and lead you to your desired destination. Get clear, stay focussed and hit your TARGET! Every Minute Counts and You Can Have It All! ®

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Walk your talk

Our health, both physical and mental, has a big influence on our fulfilment. In good health we can live the life we want, for as long as possible. But it’s often not until our health fails us that we really appreciate what’s at stake and then give our health the respect it deserves. Good health, when kept as the number one priority, gives us choices for life. No one would dispute that health should be number one priority. While many agree health is important, their actions towards living a healthy life are below par. Why do many make lifestyle choices that don’t support them? Clients starting the journey in the Leading Women Programcomplete an assessment to establish their Fulfilment Rating across all areas of their life, and in the beginning, health is most often an area that is drained. Further analysis reveals that this can sabotage other aspects like our wealth and our relationships. On the surface poor health may seem to be due to bad nutrition, unhealthy habits, lack of exercise, too much stress or not enough sleep. But by going deeper and discovering what lies beneath these poor choices – looking at why we make these choices, we can turn our health into our number one…

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