Monthly Archives: October 2015

Get fit for the long game

Imagine life to be a game and you are a player. Are you set up for successful match? It takes a certain physical and mental condition to get in the game, to play and stay in the game and to finish the game. You need to be match-fit. There are hundreds of components to success, but I have no doubt that being match-fit is the key to get you there with fewer ups and downs, to increase your endurance and take it to another level — if you choose. In life we give so much of ourselves to help and support others. Sometimes is it easy to overlook the one person that needs your help and support the most – and that’s you. For most it’s not easy to achieve some “self” time, mainly because of our nature: our nature is to give to others first. We fear being labeled as selfish if we do focus on ourselves. The act of putting your self first and getting match-fit is not selfish when you understand the benefits, not only to yourself, but those important to you. It’s not just professional sportspeople who know the importance of being match-fit. Successful people see…

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Energy for life

Energisers are those full of vitality and driven by their passion for what they value. Some say that nothing great can be achieved without enthusiasm. It’s the key to attracting what you desire. In fact energisers can be difficult to resist, as their energy is contagious. Infectious enthusiasm and conviction are the qualities that drive energisers to success! Energisers, with their strong belief, are determined to arrive at their destination. They have loads of conviction, are motivated and maintain enthusiasm as they: • focus on what’s important – they know their why • get things done that matter each and every day • influence others with their enthusiasm and confidence • accept that some will reject them but are resilient and don’t quit! In martial arts the term Tamashii is used to define the spirit of the warrior — those with unquestionable loyalty, moral fortitude, courage, persistence and sincerity. The Japanese saying nana-korobi, ya-oki means to fall down seven times and get up eight times signifying the ability to persevere. Now, the similar traits of the warrior with the indomitable spirit are used to describe those who live with great purpose and master extraordinary success. Those who live with belief,…

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The truth behind being “fine”

The “I’m fine” statement and the thinking that supports it can encourage us to avoid specific areas that need attention. By looking closely at all areas of our lives we can identify where we are fine and where we are not. How many times have you said, “I’m fine” to describe how you are going? There’s a risk that avoiding certain issues by using the “I’m fine” mentality will lead to decline. Life goes by so fast that we can sometimes forget who’s in the driver’s seat. It’s important to press pause, take our foot off the accelerator, check in to see what’s going on and, perhaps, update our plan of action. Problems begin when we hide our truth and numb our pain. Numbing our psychological pain protects us from feeling hurt. In the short term this cover-up provides some relief but long term, the effects of anesthetising what’s really going on can be harmful. Fear is often the reason for the masquerade — disguising problems prevents us from finding solutions. Concealing what is really going on and how we are truly feeling is damaging to our wellbeing. The first step to a better quality of life is to uncover…

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Ignite the conviction flame

When your values and passion are congruent, they become the fuel for your conviction. Conviction creates energy — stamina for taking action in line with your values more consistently. This persistent action helps to maintain the direction you want to go in. And the daily practice of feeling what you want in advance helps to ignite that conviction flame. Using visualisation to create mental images of what we want and feeling the emotion is like playing a game of make believe until success shows up. Positive delusion drives our action. When we feel it in advance we: • are active, not passive • don’t waste time just thinking and talking • get the things done that matter • take personal responsibility • deliver on the promises we make • hold the belief that a better life is possible. One of the quickest ways to destroy belief is to worry about what other people think, about what they say or do. Because as we begin to create the life we choose there are a lot of people that will tell you that: • you can’t • you won’t • you shouldn’t. It’s also our own mind that begins early on to…

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Hold the space for non-believers

Once we have accepted that non-believers are a part of life we have to learn to hold a space for them. The ability to hold a space for non-believers essentially means just being, without making judgement. It requires us to have: • compassion — having empathy having experienced the difficulties of being a non-believer yourself at times • respect — having reverence for their own life journey and the time and space they need to learn and grow • wisdom — having an understanding of the process to move from a non-believer to a True Believer. Now this can be very difficult to do — particularly if much of our stress or even pain has come as a result of the negative behaviours from the non-believers. I have studied and practiced the art of negotiation for a few decades. One of the key principles of negotiation is to practice role reversal — when we can see life through someone else’s eyes — even if we don’t like or agree with how they are showing up. When we use role reversal we can come from a place of understanding rather than a place of anger, criticism, blame, disappointment and judgement. Holding…

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